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I Might Need Security

Newest untouchable anthem?

Absolutely 100% “I Might Need Security” from the one and only Chance the Rapper.  I dedicate this song to no one in particular but to my insecurities, my fears, my doubts, my regrets, my haters, and the everyday work of the devil.  It’s so beautiful when you find a song that connects with your current state of mind and talks to your soul so accurately.  To all the negativities in my life, I sing this song to you on a daily.  I think my negativity is going to need security because I’m coming with full force.

Queen on Queens; Queen on!

◊ Queen Bri ◊

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Life of Sunflower, An Afro-Futuristic Story

My melanin kissed skin loves Sun, for he makes me glow so radiantly.  And Sun loves me for which he does not burn me easily.  He, Sun, gives me energy.

I love Night Sky for she looks so much like me, our dark tones of different shades.  She has stars that shine bright like I.  Night Sky is my calm.

My name is Sunflower and Sun, and Night Sky are my friends; they are my best friends, for they do not judge my color, my faith, my hair, or who I am.  They accept me, for they created me with their deep love they had for each other’s differences.

“A flower does not think of competing to the flower next to it.  It just blooms.”

~Unknown

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Sunflower in Lavender by Donna Meadows

I am a different soul.  I am not from here.  I was planted here but my seeds come from another universe.  A universe that only the free spiritual intellects can travel to and from.  I visit home a lot.  Yes, we teleport but no, not from a machine.  For Sun gives us energy.  That’s how we met.

Sun blessed me with melanin as he gave me energy to teleport to Earth when I was just some seeds.  Once I reached Earth, he kissed me in which left me with my final glow.

“Understand me.  I’m not like an ordinary world.  I have my madness, I live in another dimension and do not have time for things that have no soul.”

~Charles Bukowski  

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The Art of Negative Space by Tang Yau Hoong

For I am something different, therefore, the mass of humans here resent me and my kind.  I am different but I am beautiful.  They hate that I am the world’s most beautiful gift of life.  They hate my friendship with Sun and Night Sky.  For they do not want us united; that is simply too much power for them to control.  They don’t like different, so they try to destroy us or control us.  We have been sprayed with chemicals, burned, sold off as gifts then left to die because we were not fed or taken care of like we aren’t living things.

“She was one of the rare ones, so effortlessly herself, and the world loved her for it.”

~Atticus

Times have changed for us, my kind, but we still struggle the same.  I’ve been tugged at and yanked several times in my life for being different, but my ancestors’ roots have attached onto mine.  For I am Sunflower, with the support of trillions of different roots supporting me.

“It’s better to be hated for what you are than loved for what you are not.”

~Unknown

Night Sky and I met while on my travels.  It was my first time leaving Earth, heading back home.  In order to travel back, one must connect with their spiritual intuition.  Meditation is the state we must be in to get home.  One’s mind cannot be clouded with the unnecessary; the portal will refuse to open because unnecessary is not allowed where I’m from.  There is no purpose for it.

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Unknown Name & Artist

Candles lit, while incense burn.  Chakra crystals all around me.  Mala beads in hand.  “Flowers” by Willow Smith playing in the background.  Night Sky welcomed me with open arms, “Girl your skin is just like mine, and afro just like mine.  My body has been brutally invaded like yours, by ‘those people,’ with their airplanes, rockets, astronauts claiming my children as their own.  Do you know how it feels to hear my daughter cry out when they stuck their flag poles in her unwillingly, claiming her as their own?  They then used her for child porn with their camera-robot left to roam all over her body as it pleases.”

I comforted her as tears ran down her face flooding Earth.  She said, “They could’ve asked if I was okay with it…But what hurts most is, they never even said sorry.  They told me, ‘Get over it, it happened in the past.  As if it’s still not happening.’”  As I looked at the pain in her eyes, I held her hand and told her, “We will overcome this together, for our struggle is way too similar.  Our struggle is one.”

“Our backs tell stories no books have the spine to carry.”

~Women of Colour Rupi Kaur  

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Unknown Name & Artist

Tears flowing out our eyes, we had to let it out.  Then we realized where we were.  We reached the gates of home.  The protector, Butterfly, asked me if I knew where I was.  My response was simple, “Home?”, with unsteadiness in my voice.  She replied, “Your home has a name you know.  You’ve officially returned back home to Freedom.  Welcome back.”

“You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars.”

~Buddha

The gates opened but I could not move.  To my surprise, Freedom was a magical place.  A place in which one can travel through time.

As I went to take my first step, my roots began to break off.  Within a blink of an eye, my ancestors stood before me.

My grandfathers, that I never got the blessing to meet, smiled so proudly as if I just accomplished the biggest test of life.  Grandpa T, I ran to with excitement.  I can finally see, touch, speak to with a response; so many questions.  I turned around to see Grandpa D; he was hoping to get the same reaction in turn, but he didn’t.  I was still angry and resentful for he was on Earth majority of my life but never reached out to do grandpa things.  I felt fire in my veins and tears down my face.  He teared up at the thought of me not being so ecstatic, but Grandpa T was on his side.  Grandpa T said, “You’ve traveled too far of a distance for anger now.  This isn’t Earth.  We forgive here in Freedom.”  Grandpa D didn’t have to say sorry, his eyes said more.

“When a deep injury is done to us, we never heal until we forgive.”

~Nelson Mandela

As I took both my grandfathers’ hands, there was a beam of energy within my heart.  More energy than chakra crystals can provide; it was like Sun took over my heart and was so joyful that he couldn’t contain himself.

They led me to a field of other flowers, trees, lady bugs, and more.  Then I heard the music.  African drums playing in a distance, getting louder and more intense as it got closer.  Music, the music that flows through my kind had awaken.  More of my ancestors appeared before me.  Dancing.  They were dancing so happily, gracefully, and free and welcoming back home, to Freedom.

“Is the world we live in truly our reality?  Or is it possibly the dream to our reality, which is our meditation state of mind?”

~Brianna D.


 

This is a piece of my work from a course I took my junior year of college.  The class was Afro-futurism.  This was my light bulb behind who I was, and who I am.  It was clear that I was an Afro-futurist.

Afro-futurism
afrōˈfyo͞oCHərizəm
noun

-a movement in literature, music, art, etc., featuring futuristic or science fiction themes which incorporate elements of black history and culture
However, the definition of Afro-futurism is based on one’s own perception.
So here is a list of films, books, and some songs for you to have your own reaction:
  • Space is the Place (Film by Sun Ra)
  • Afrofuturism: The World of Black Sci-Fi and Fantasy Culture (Book by Ytasha Womack)
  • The ArchAndroid (Album by Janelle Monae)
  • The Last Angel of History (Film)
  • Black Panther (Film)
  • Blade (Film)
  • ATLiens (Album by OutKast)
  • Dirty Computer (Film)
  • Afro Samurai (Film by Fuminori Kizaki)
  • Binti (Book by Nnedi Okorafor)
  • Brown Girl in the Ring (Book by Nalo Hopkinson)
  • Electric Arches (Book by Eve L. Ewing)

Queen on Queens; Queen on!

◊ Queen Bri ◊

A Letter to Serena Williams

Dear Serena,

I am not a fan, I am a student.  I am learning so much from you.  Black Girl Magic, I am still in aww of your magic.  When I look at you, I see you more than just a tennis player; you are a girl from Compton that just won’t stop.  I’ve come to realize that I have looked up to you and Venus more than I really known.  Growing up, my sisters and I would blow up a balloon and pretend we were you two and play “tennis” across my parents’ bed.  I used to think it was just tennis but it is more than that.  It’s more than proving everyone else wrong.  It’s more than winning.  It’s conquering everything that you know you deserve.  It’s being better than what your imagination can think of.

Within that, I say thank you for humbly being yourself.  I see you more than just the greatest tennis player, I see you as a strong example of a black woman who feels deeply passionate about something and doesn’t allow anyone to tell you that your passion is wrong.  But today, today I saw that it is okay to be emotional in front of others.  It is okay to not be seen as a rock allllll the time.  You tried so hard to keep your composure but your emotions was much more, even without words.  I am still learning not to be that rock all the time.  One shouldn’t have to rely on anyone to feel passion but I must say you sparked the passion in my heart for everything it is that I have always dreamt of.  I no longer want to dream about what it is that I want; I want to make it happen.  I am a girl from the Bronx, and I won’t stop until I am satisfied.

Thank you for being one of my biggest inspirations.

Queen on Queens; Queen on!

◊ Queen Bri ◊

Every Morning I Will

  • Thank God I was able to open my eyes
  • Tell the Universe that today will be a good day
  • Smile
  • Breathe in all positivity and exhale any negativity that may exist
  • Look myself in the mirror with love
  • Tell myself that I will conquer the day
  • Tell myself I will be successful today, I will accomplish at least 1 goal today – no matter how big or small that goal may seem
  • Forgive myself for the mistakes I will make today
  • Remind myself that I cannot control everything that happens
  • Prepare for my growth

 

Queen on Queens; Queen on!

◊ Queen Bri ◊

Free Fall of Faith

You know the saying, “leap of faith,” right?

Well my experience was indeed a “free fall of faith.”

I was completely unhappy with my career, to the point of straight misery and anxiety when thinking of it. I stuck with it for 9 months when I knew week 1 that, this was not going to be a pleasurable experience.

Not to get into the details of things, but nonetheless, I left my job. My first full-time career after college, full health benefits, good pay.

Did I mention, I left without having another job?

I found myself turning down interviews because my current job demanded so much of my time, I couldn’t make the interviews. I also told my parents the day before my last day of work.

The awkwardness of sitting at the dinner table after letting them know. My dad completely silent. My mom starting into my soul. But then the reaction I received was relieving. They explained they trusted my decision as long as I thought about it and while I had the opportunity to do so.

I then got a job and with one of my old companies that I love sooo much. It was such a family just like I remember with the company but at a different property.

But then it happened.

The opportunity I’ve been waiting for and praying for. I applied for this company months back and got turned down but asked to come back for a new property opening up with the company. It was a 2 day process. Day 1, you were informed if you were invited back for interviews. I was invited back and then towards the end of day 2 they started calling names, mine was not called. But then they gave those remaining another task, put together a puzzle. The puzzle said, “hired!”

I kept my cool, but that night all I did was cry and smile, smile and cry. To think I took such a free fall by trusting in myself and my gut.

This is just to say, being 20 in this world now is HARDDDDDD. You feel as though you are suppose to have it all together while living your best life.  Just know you got this Queens! Trust your intuition and have faith in yourself; whatever your dreams are, no matter how far fetched they seem to look like, go for it!

Queen on Queens; Queen on!

◊ Queen Bri ◊

Trusting Her Timing

I’m learning to leave my worries with God while understanding that the action and effort is up to me.

The saying, “Let go and let God.” We must truly break down this meaning to our youth for no one broke it down clearly to me. There is such erudition in understanding that we must let go of our worries, struggles, doubts, and and form of negativity to God. For she will do her part. But we can not ask God to help up make it to the top of the mountain if we are not willing to climb.

Prayer + Faith + Effort + Will + Patience = Blessings in its most raw form

I am understanding that there can be no missing links in this equation. Additionally, I do not choose the timing of my blessings. I CANNOT ask God to put a move on it to answer my questions or to give me guidance to my pondering.

Our lives are already destined. Whatever our hearts are set on, whatever our goals, they are already ours. But what matters is the effort we put into them and allowing God’s timer to go off.

I once felt God was testing me harder than I deserved. It was like she felt I was stronger than I truly was. Wellllllllll let me tell you, silly me! Reflection made me realize that she was testing me at all. She was simply telling me that I can endure anything. The opportunities she gave to me and removed were not to tease, but to show me that I had the ability and will to get that far but that opportunity was not truly for me.

“You have to accept your fate; do it without bitterness and stay humble.”

Anthony Scaramucci

Humble was nowhere to be found in my body. Bitterness was all I knew at that point. My God does not believe in bitterness. However, my universe continues to turn. Time and patience taught me that bitterness will consume me to a point where that is all I will ever know.

Truthfully, I don’t know how that equation fell into my lap but once I applied it to my life, the universe exploded to recreate itself for me. I saw God smile at me. I felt the joy from my ancestors through my bones. I loved myself for my ambition.

—————————–

Hi God,

I just want to say thank you blessing myself, family, friends, and people I don’t know with the opportunity to open our eyes to see a new day. You blessed us with the opportunity to be a better us today than we were yesterday. I ask that you guide us that we are able to fulfill that opportunity.

I ask that today is a positive day for us all. That we love, we are loved, set goals, achieve goals, we smile, laugh, and give off the same positivity that we receive. I ask that you guide us all to know that your love for us is much stronger than the devil’s hate can ever be.

I just want to say thank you for all of my blessings, they never go unappreciated. I ask that you forgive me for my ignorance and arrogance when I do not understand that you are working on blessings when things are not going my way. I thank you for your patience and unconditional love. I ask that you continue to guide me in the right direction of the success of my life in every aspect. I ask that you continue to guide me to make the right decisions for now, the future, myself, and those in my life.

I ask that you continue to watch over my family, friends, and I that you protect us from all hurt, harm, disease, or perils of being the world.

I love you

(Kiss)

Amen.

20 Somethings

Prayin’ the 20 somethings don’t kill me, kill me – SZA

The phase in which we feel we are old enough to have it all together yet young enough to not have it all together. It’s the phase in which we are so lost in trying to find ourselves while trying to be the best daughter/son, sister/brother, friend, employee, student, mom/dad, and more.

Per usual, older generations complain about the 20 somethings of this generation.

“You guys disregard tradition. You feel you don’t have to get a job and work hard.”

“We all had to work jobs we didn’t like to make it and to support our family”

“You think living in your own little world is going to last.”

“I would’ve love to be a ______, but I didn’t have time. I did what I had to do.”

….I’m sorry, but I’m just a tad bit addled. What is wrong with living in my world of happiness?

Who says I have to work a job for 25 years that I don’t like? Society?

I will never put off what truly makes me happy for anything. When God blesses me with a family, I will support them with doing what I love and with what makes me truly happy. Tradition is how each individual perceives it. Our generation of 20 somethings have decided that working a 9-5 does not make them happy and that there is a different way of making things happen.

I LOVE and ADMIRE the 20 somethings that are so free and creative with everything that they do! Leaving their 9-5 steady job to say they want to travel the world to learn and teach yoga or whatever it is that makes them happy. Sometimes the “I don’t care mentality” is not a negative thing.

I don’t think we understand how deep some of our opinions can cut into the mind of others. We need to learn to mind what we say to each other at times. Not everyone has such thick skin to disregard the opinions of others. Your personal opinion may have swayed a multi-millionaire from taking the risk of doing what made them happy. I, myself, am learning to think about what words I allow to come out when people ask for my opinion on decisions. I never want to say something that will halt someone from achieving their dreams.

Sending all love to the 20 somethings just trying to make things happen the best they can. To those searching for themselves, finding themselves, healing, setting goals, achieving goals, and being unapologetically 20 something! Let the happiness in your heart guide your way.

.………………… Every 20 somethings’ stages are different ………………

This Sunflower is 21:

  • Finding self – Complete
  • Understanding Self – Locked
  • Solidarity – Complete
  • Healing – Always in progress
  • Happiness – Always in progress
  • Career – Loading
  • Full Self Love – Loading
  • Love – Locked
  • Spirituality – Always in progress
  • Freedom – Locked

We shall see what other stages come along. img_0060img_0059img_0061img_0058

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